Or perhaps there should be a very large “TRYING” in front of that heading,
I wish I could get some proper sleep. When I return from the trail, so many people say that I will probably enjoy my bed but in all honesty it is not true. I struggle to go to bed, hanging around in the living room, falling asleep in front of the TV and when I do go to bed I waking up terrified after having bad dreams. Ugh. Seriously Hamster? You had all the time in the world on the trail but now you choose to run simulations at night? Strangely enough, a lot of my dreams are about the river… drifting on a boat down the river in pitch black darkness… and when I wake up the line between dream (fiction) and reality is very blurred. Sitting upright in my bed staring at the carpet around me like it was cold dark water. I didn’t think I had such a bad time on the river, but clearly my body felt under pressure or tension and the Hamster is now (or still) trying to work through it. I just want to get over it… get some sleep.
I spent the rest of the day unpacking my back pack… getting things clean (some of it dry) and looking at what is broken or missing. In between all of this there was also catching up with my website a little, now that I am back behind my computer and not having to use my phone to do updates. Lots of TV in the mix too. I didn’t watch TV on the trail and turned into a vegetable late today in front of the tv… catching up with (what I think is) the sad state of the world.
I guess it is all about finding the balance… between good and evil, tv time and meditation, exercise and eating bad food… figuring it all out? And what comes next?
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43.5323 – 172.5567
26 December 2024
FP-350
4 responses to “Finding a new balance.”
Ugh. Seriously Hamster?
Ai toggie! – Sorry that you going through this Phil!
Can’t remember when last I watched some TV – but sometimes it is needed – just being a “vegetable” – comfortably numb ..
This song sprung to mind – Depeche Mode – Get the Balance Right …
Yes – what comes next – what will 2025 hold for us all …
May the Universe show us her Rainbow Colours ‘-)
Not “Ai toggie”… it is kind of to be expected to be completely honest. I will strike a balance again, just have to keep working on it.
Great wish, “May the universe show us all her rainbow colours.”
After catching up with your blog and currently attempting to accept my new reality with Kathy’s family in the UK, lots of people plus noise, endless sometimes (often) pointless chatter, I am reminded of how much comfort I would take from being a hermit! I really could just pack a bag, head for the hills and quite happily manage without people and all the nonsense of the world around us.
As for you Philip, you are obviously faced with some massive decisions that will decide the course of the next phase of your life and would probably be easier with one or more friends. This ‘old’ friend whilst full of wisdom and experience might not be the best choice and I’m on the other side of the planet atm, but hopefully there’s others you can bounce ideas off.
Good luck with your challenges Cliff, they sound pretty “1st-world” to me. We all forget to appreciate our comforts (especially at home) until we lose them.
You are an awesome friend and I will always appreciate the wisdom you have to share.